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Movie Review: San Andreas (2015)


Starring: The Rock, Carla Gugino, Alexandra Daddario & Ioan Gruffudd

Directed by: Brad Peyton

I think The Rock is a terrific actor. People might think I’m only saying that because I’m a wrestling fan, but that isn’t the case at all. I’m able to separate him from his two careers so I mean it when I say that I’m a massive admirer of his acting talents. He’s come a long way since the days of Doom and Tooth Fairy (Not as bad as it’s made out to be). I went to see this with a mate of mine, the same mate who tagged himself along to see Fifty Shades with me because he was convinced that he was going to see a big budget version of Chitty Chitty Gang Bang, here however, he thought San Andreas was Grand Theft Auto the film. Bless him.

Chief Ray Gaines (Rock) is a search and rescue helicopter pilot working for the Los Angeles Fire Department. Ray is a guy who’s been through it all. He’s currently in the middle of a divorce, trying to come to terms that his ex-wife has moved in with her new partner (Gruffudd) and haunted by the death of his youngest daughter. He’s been through it all you could say. Meanwhile, a massive earthquake is triggered at Hoover Dam killing thousands. The earthquake hits central Los Angeles causing the casualties to skyrocket. Gaines’ oldest daughter, Blake (Alexandra Daddario), is at the heart of the scene. Ray and ex-wife Emma (Cugino) need to put differences aside to rescue their daughter. Is an earthquake one obtical that Rocky can overcome? Well, he had that shitty feud with Billy Gunn which resulted in a “kiss my ass” match at SummerSlam ’99 so an earthquake has got to be a piece of piss, right?

A lot of disaster movies tend to follow the same formula, and this is no different. It’s really a mixed bag. Has a great cast granted, and the special effects are outstanding. I can imagine the 3D showing would be pleasing on the eyes watching all those building crumbling before you, but I think that’s where it ends with the special effects. That’s what carries the entire film in all honesty. The movie’s characters and plot prove less than structurally sound. Hugo Johnstone-Burt just seems out of place here, he comes across too much like a polite, bumbling Englishman in the same moulding as Hugh Grant. Ioan Gruffudd’s character is a bastard who’d end up selling his own grandmother if it meant safety from San Andreas, Kylie Minogue has a brief appearance, and I still haven’t forgiven Paul Giamatti for his portray of R.H.I.N.O in Amazing Spiderman 2. Rock was on top form as always (I swear I am not showing any favouritism towards ‘the great one’). I shared my feelings on Rocky as an actor and my opinion is still favourable. He’s such a versatile actor who can do it all. Mark my words he will win an Oscar one day because he’s so talented at what he does (still needs that WWE Hall of Fame induction though).

Cheesy for all the right reasons, San Andreas gets my recommendation if you ever fancy killing two hours.

Rating: *** ½ (Aye, it’s canny like)

Just realised I’ve never once called The Rock Dwayne Johnson in this review. It’s still real to me dammit!!


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